Friday, September 4, 2009

Underwhelming 100th Post!

Yes, it only took three years, but SunnySyde has reached it's 100th Post! Rather than create something extravagant and actually "quality", I have chosen to take the road traveled by many before me - the 100th episode clipshow. Sure, literary clip shows just aren't done, but that's just because I'm the first one to ever think of it, right?? So...let's take a look back at the last 100 posts, assembled with no rhyme or reason, shall we? Like you have a choice.

"Billy: What am I gonna do with all these turnips?
Old Prospector: Why dems turnips are evil I tells ya, they're built on an ancient Canadian Indian burial ground."

"Also, I’d like to apologize for my gratuitous judging-based-on-appearance, I swear I don’t commonly practice this practice. However, this night was different, and when you’re surrounded with “artsy free-thinking artsy artists”, they’re basically asking you to judge them by their appearance. To my credit, I was right every single time."

"- Your child’s skin, liver, or brain is infected by Gak™, which also goes by the name of Radon Glyciphonate III.
- Upon being 'slimed' your child goes blind.
- Your child selects a “physical challenge”, and it turns out to be 'Shave Mark Somer’s back'."

"'Every Sunday night, some local sandwiches ring my doorbell and run off. I blame society.'
- Miss Gertrude Biels, Tonton, Connecticut"

"-You have wisely chosen not to feed your giant origami swan, but unfortunately that results in Lucius unfolding from exhaustion and landing in the ocean as one giant sheet of construction paper. Fear not however, as a ship will be waiting for you wherever you land. The ship shall be called the S.S. Ess-Ess, and will be helmed by a half-man half-wheelchair named Toronto. Toronto shall feed you and keep you warm, occasionally boring you with his stories of life as a buoy hunter. Regardless, he will drop you off at the isle of Manhattan after about three weeks. Make sure he hasn’t stolen your ivory box – men of the sea are not to be trusted."

"Okay we didn’t do our research with that last one, sue us. Just kidding, you can’t! You don’t know our names! (One of us is named Marcus, but you don’t know which one!)"

"If Stella hadn’t gotten her groove back up to that point in the film, I imagine the airport scene was where she got her groove back. Pardon this viewer if he feels a bit cheated. As someone looking to get their own groove back, this film’s answer seems to be seduce a younger Jamaican man, get him to buy me a ton of stuff, have him propose, not give him an answer, then give him an answer in an airport without any discernable scene that explains my change of heart."

"Keeping your skin soft and healthy is also a top priority in Harbasham’s bathroom routine. “I strongly recommend honey glaze,” explains Harbasham. “If you reek of ham for the rest of the day, that’s just part of who you are girl!” Saying this made Harbasham crave some honey glaze, so we took the interview to the bathroom."

"Cindy Relf, was merely responding “K” to a message, a venture that in hindsight hardly seems worth it."

“Are the guitar players with sufficient years of experience in the crowd and who also brought their equipment to the show today which would be tough because of the tightness of security but either way get over it figure something out ready to rock?”

"The Trio carried on with what can be best described as “musical masturbation”, in fact that may have been the name of the song, as was anyone’s guess due to the poor PA. All that the crowd knew was that after the Trio riffed on a sloppier than hell free-form eight bar, Hadge launched into a spoons solo that was cute at first, but lost some momentum in the eighteenth or nineteenth minute. Literally, he just kept going, and the other two members could be seen getting cake across the room. After he finished the “song”, Hadge could be seen yelling profanities at the other members to put down their (blank)ing cake and get their (blank)s back on the stage. This did not go over well."

"Dear M+M,
The Skittle Dudes"

"Hats are not indie, but is the my poem about hats indie?"

"Some Fast and Furious: Kahuna Breeze"

ME: ' have a name?'"

PARTY #2: 'Oh, I'm Tom/Phil/Dumbass/It Doesn't matter'"

"Nevertheless, like a “q” and a “u”, Jesse needed the Rippers, and the Rippers only too late, realized they needed Jesse; for they were perfect compliments to one another. Venturing out on their own, the Rippers, known then as Barry and the Rippers, quickly lost the interest of their fanbase."

"Why We Are Sending You This Notice? Because you suck at math.

Why We Made The Change - Because you apparently can't handle simple addition, Ace."

"0:28 -'Hey Johnny, you know what this picture really needs? Fat kid.'"

(Scene from Seinfeld where they discuss shrinkage)

It sure has been a long, pointless journey. I'd like to thank the 3 of you (including myself) who read this, and keep the online periodical (it's NOT a blog) going! Here's to 100 more...................!

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