Monday, January 25, 2010

Two-Thousand Ten = More Like Two-Thousand FUN

"When are you going to update Sunny Side for the New Year?" - No one.

"Come on, we're almost a month into 2010...give us SOMETHING!" - Not anybody.

"PLEASE JUST UPDATE YOUR BLOG! IT'S DRIVING ME BANANAS!" - Chester Alfonso (not a real dude)

Well, the people have clearly spoken, and you know how I am when people say things. I just can't leave my imaginary fans hanging. In all truth though, we have entered a new year, and new years mean new opportunities. Also, new calenders. Guess which one I'm more excited for! (HINT: It includes at least twelve photos of babies dressed as animals or vice-versa)

Though I haven't made any official new years "resolutions", I have a few new years "to-do's". Reason being, I'm much more likely to get something done on a "to-do" list than something that's a grand, sweeping "resoLUTION." Nobody has a resolution to pick up some new socks, but somebody may put "bang seven robot women" on a to-do list. See what I'm saying, America? And parts of Canada?

That being said, here is a portion of my 2010 To-Do List:

- Write a spec script for "24" where the characters get Chipotle in the first ten minutes. I think what happens in the remaining fifty is pretty self explanatory.

- Record an album with T. Bone Burnett, but not as Producer. I want him catering. His name sounds like he'd make a good chef as well.

- Train to watch a marathon. Those things are booooring without proper conditioning.

- Juggle being an everyday mom and a crime fighter by night. What's a girl to do?

- Pitch my idea for PRECIOUS: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire: The Animated Series. Yes, there will be a Junkyard Gang involved.

- Convince the writers at Gawker that if they're gonna try to be witty - COMMIT!

- Make fewer PRECIOUS jokes.

- I'm sorry, but seriously, did anyone see that movie? It was not based on a true story (It was in fact based on the novel...ah, forget it), so while the events depicted are very real and occur everyday. I don't think they ALL occur to ONE person in such a short span of time, as they do to our hero in this film. Precious just can't catch a break. I was half expecting a zombie attack to break out at the end, because that was the ONLY BAD THING THAT HADN'T HAPPENED YET.

- Waste less time on To-Do lists talking about Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire.

- Is Sapphire just a last name? Is it like a Cher thing? And if so, what else has she written? Why should we care that Sapphire has written the book that this movie is based on. Was anyone in the theater lobby undecided going, "Hmm, well we could see 'Up in the Air' or a 'Squeakuel' of something...is there anything playing based on the works of Sapphire? Well slap me sideways, will ya look at that! Playing at 5:10!" I also can't help but wonder if "Push" by Sapphire now has a sticker on it that reads "'Push' by Sapphire - now a major motion picture: 'Precious': based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire'".

- "Precious" would have made a very fine title on its own. Is this titling trend going to continue? Will we see "The Hobbit" be titled "The Hobbit: Based on the novel The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien"? Or "The Rachel Ray Show: Based on the series 30-Minute Meals by Rachel Ray"? This will not increase book sales.

- Don't immediately contradict by To-Do's.

- Go to sleep right now.

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